


Drawing the Line Between Who You Are and How Others See You

by LilliRonan



Series: Lines Drawn (Drabbles and Snippets About Self Discovery) [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Aromantic Stiles Stilinski, F/M, Implied Future Polyamory, Implied Scott McCall/Stiles Stilinski, M/M, Mentioned Stiles Stilinski/Malia Tate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-07
Updated: 2015-07-07
Packaged: 2018-04-08 05:04:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4291740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilliRonan/pseuds/LilliRonan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles was more than a little relieved to have something to cling to, something that told him he wasn't the only one, even if it was only a made up word he'd found on the internet. Even if no one else believed it was a real thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drawing the Line Between Who You Are and How Others See You

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING:
> 
> This is part of my Drawn Lines series, which includes polyamory! Stiles is in an established relationship with Malia and loves her very much. He also loves Scott very much. 
> 
> Polyamory is implied in this work, but not displayed or practiced. 
> 
> If you have any problems or concerns about my tagging, please let me know (n a respectful way, if possible) down in the comments! I'm still new to ao3, so I'm not sure how everything works around here.
> 
> I want it to be made known that in the future, I WILL be using pairing specific tags to tag this series because each segment of the series will focus on a pair or trio and will be tagged accordingly for that trio!
> 
> I understand that some of you are triggered by polyamorous content, but all of my fics will be tagged "polyamory" and "polyamorous pack" so be sure to read the tags before reading the fic (which is something you should do in the first place if you know you have triggers. It is NOT my job to take care of YOU.)!

Stiles wasn't sure he was meant to have a relationship. His feelings were always in an indecipherable bundle, and while he felt romantic inclinations towards Malia, he felt those same inclinations towards Scott just the same. He'd never considered himself the romantic type--not like Scott who was the textbook definition, who enjoyed candlelit dinners and long walks on the beach and staring soulfully into someone's eyes.

Stiles had always been more of the 'I like to kiss and cuddle sometimes, but only very specific times and only on my own terms when I think it makes sense o do those things' type of guy. He heard Scott describe wanting to be with Kira every minute, always thinking of holding her, kissing her. Stiles just couldn't relate. He wanted to be intimate with the people he loved. 

That part made sense. Being intimate with the person you're in love with made sense. The part that made Stiles' head spin was his inability to limit that feeling to just one person. He wanted to be intimate with everyone he loved and cared about, show them affection, kiss them, spend all night staying up with them. 

Scattered was how he felt. 

'Am I just high maintenance?' He pondered, toeing his shoes off and flopping face first onto his bed. These thoughts had been increasing in multitude lately as his urges to be intimate with not just Malia, but Scott as well, grew. You couldn't be in love with more than one person, could you?

And there was that question again. 'Am I in love with Scott?' Was what he felt for Scott romantic at all? Was what he felt for Malia romantic? What was the difference between romantic love, platonic love, intimate love, passionate love? 

He thought back to the Kiss-in-the-Jeep incident. Scott made him feel safe, warm. He had a place to land when he was around Scott, and he loved that. His reasons for loving Malia were the opposite. Being with Malia was like diving into a cold pool. Being with Malia made him feel confident and happy. 

Stiles groaned as he felt the tell-tale signs of a headache beginning behind his closed eyes. 

"I am SO high maintenance!" He groaned loudly to his empty room. He almost regretted it when he heard his dad call up, concerned, asking if everything was alright. 

Finally, he decided to take matters into his own hands. Google had never failed him before (a blatant lie, but a comforting one for now), and it was the closest thing he had to a confidant. He couldn't very well talk to Scott about his feelings could he? (He could, and probably should, he knew, but he would probably end up failing in his confession miserably.) 

He tried a few different Google searches, starting with the definition of romantic love (none of the definitions cleared much up for him), then moving to the question 'is it possible to fall in love with two people at once?' The question yielded mixed results ranging from 'absolutely' to 'you don't love them at all if you think you might love someone else,' which only served to make him feel sufficiently horrible. 

He was about to give up for the day when he spotted a word he had seen and heard before, but never given much thought. Aromantic. 

"Aromantic." He mumbled out loud to himself, biting at his lip and grudgingly typing the word into his search browser. A wave of disappointment washed over him when he realized he related to almost nothing on the multiple lists of 'you might be aro IF' he scrolled through. Still, pressing forward, he researched more intently, a little intrigued by the descriptions he found. 

He found himself identifying with certain descriptions in multiple subcategories of the aromantic spectrum, though not 100% in any one category. A stone settled in the pit of his stomach. These words looked made up. Really, who the hell was going to listen to him if he insisted he was 'quoiromantic?' At least 'aromantic' had a clear definition. Doubt settled over him like a blanket that was too thick. 

He related to this, but would anyone take him seriously? Would Scott take him seriously? Stiles wasn't fond of not knowing. He had never liked ambiguity, and yet it seemed ambiguity was the very definition of how his romantic attraction (or lack thereof) was defined. He didn't know if he felt romantic feelings, couldn't define romance for himself, and certainly couldn't differentiate between platonic love and any other kind if his inclinations towards both Scott and Malia were anything to go by. 

Though he was more confused than ever, a warm feeling spread in his stomach--he was more than a little relieved to have something to cling to, something that told him he wasn't the only one, even if it was only a made up word he'd found on the internet. Even if no one else believed it was a real thing. 

Stiles laid back on his bed, an uncontrollable smile blossoming across his lips as he mumbled to himself, "Yeah, I'm high maintenance alright." 

The other half went unspoken, 'And maybe that's okay.'

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, so Stiles is having some doubts, and the next time we revisit his aromantic (quoiromantic) feelings, he'll be having a talk with Scott and Malia both!
> 
> I may get into some of the other characters next, or I may decide to keep the points of view between Scott and Stiles only. Tell me what you think in the comments.


End file.
